The Hollywood Sign is the most magnificent sign in the world and the second-most photographed sign in the United States (the first being the rest stop sign on I-80 outside of Omaha, which reads, "Next Exit Pubic Restrooms"). The Hollywood Sign is so impressive that some actors, many of them Scientologists, say it can be seen from heaven.
One time, after David “Dave” attempted to scale the “Y” to glue a series of headshots to the aluminum letter, an LAPD helicopter chased him for an hour until he stumbled upon the Monastery of the Angels, a communion of cloistered Dominican nuns located beneath the sign. They offered refuge and gave David “Dave” chocolate and pumpkin bread. In exchange, David “Dave” Feng Shui’d the nuns’ gift shop. Thank you, Sister Mary Pia.
DAVID “DAVE” AUDIO MESSAGE An Intimate Moment
DAVID “DAVE’S” TRAVEL INSIGHTS Echo Park
Echo Park, the hipster neighborhood of David “Dave” and the home of the Los Angeles Dodgers, has the most delicious taco trucks in the country. Tacos Arizas, located in a late-model Winnebago camper alongside the Walgreens on Logan Street, serves up carnitas tacos that would make Taco John ponder suicide.
DAVID “DAVE’S” TRAVEL INSIGHTS Hollywood Walk of Fame
Hollywood Boulevard offers something for everyone and is a must stop for any LA visitor.
Take in the Hollywood Walk of Fame, which stretches up and down Hollywood Boulevard, past drug treatment programs, Scientology reading centers, and one-of-a kind wig shops. Finish your tour with some shots of Hollywood Boulevard’s biggest and only stars, the Hollywood Boulevard Superheroes. They’re a cadre of unemployed actors who dress up as such lovable, admirable characters as Superman, Paris Hilton or Butt-head. Snap a photo with your favorite, but don’t forget to tip a dollar. To learn more about these Hollywood players, catch the award-winning documentary made on their triumphs and trials.
DAVID “DAVE’S” TRAVEL INSIGHTS Star Tours
If you’re planning a trip to LA, don’t hesitate to contact me and I’ll make sure you get a map of the stars who place the best pre-owned items by their trash cans. And if you start to question my ability to accurately identify a star’s home, no worries. I think once you’re holding Tori Spelling’s Sunbeam humidifier, Lil Wayne’s Omron high blood pressure machine, or Johnny Depp’s King Kooker 30-Quart Turkey Fryer, you’ll be quite happy with my tour.
DAVID “DAVE” AUDIO MESSAGE An Intimate Moment
DAVID “DAVE’S” TRAVEL INSIGHTS Preparation for Travel
Too often we depart on trips without considering our appearance. A long time ago folks wore suits when they boarded airplanes or steamers or Mayflowers, because they knew the importance of looking good before seizing control of another culture. If Cortez hadn’t arrived with that cool feather hat and dapper Purple-Rain-Prince-era-puffy shirt, he would have quickly been run out of the Yucatan Peninsula and we’d all be forced to speak Maya now when spring breaking in Cancun. I don’t even want to think about what that would do the vibe of Senor Frogs. TRAVEL TIP: Remember the Conquistadors and always wear your Sunday’s best, when arriving as a guest.
